Day 3
Hope your devos have been going swell the past three days!
Acts 8:29-31 29 The Holy Spirit said to Philip, "Go over and walk along beside the carriage." 30 Philip ran over and heard the man reading from the prophet Isaiah. Philip asked, "Do you understand what you are reading?" 21 The man replied, "How can I, unless someone instructs me?" And he urged Philip to come up into the carriage and sit with him. (NLT)
When is the last time you felt the Holy Spirit prompt you to do something? Say something? Read? Pray? Did you do it? Or perhaps you thought it was your mind just talking to yourself. I know I struggle with listening and following the Holy Spirit.
What stuck out to me today was "Philip ran..." Crazy! He heard the Holy Spirit and didn't even hesitate. He didn't walk over. He didn't stroll over. He booked it! "The Holy Spirit said to Philip, "Go..."Philip ran..."!!!! That my faith would be like Philip's. That I would run when I hear God's voice.
Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts
Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Closed Fist
I have you ever gotten your hand caught in the cookie jar?
I mean literally. I guess the cookie jar wouldn't work...but for me, I got my hand caught in the candy jar. You know what jar I'm talking about. The one where the hole is just big enough to get your hand in, but not big enough so that once you grab a fist full of delicious Tootsie Rolls you can't get your hand out. So infuriating!! Then you realize the only way you can get candy out is to grab one piece of candy at a time...and by then end of the process it's no longer worth it. You're angry that you've only gotten two pieces out, your hand hurts from trying to force it through the small opening, and your mouth has yet to taste sweet success because you're so busy getting the little pieces of candy out you forget your main goal in the first place!!
It seems like life simulates this scenario all too often.
We want something, but no matter how hard we hold on to it, how hard we pull out, we can't have it. Our hands are literally stuck. Next thing we know, is we're miserable. We've got this jar attached to our hand inhibiting us from doing daily activities. Eating, shaking new acquaintances' hands, opening doors; all become a challenge.
Just like eating with a jar attached to our hand is next to impossible (Assume that both hands are in jars. We're a greedy culture.), so can nourishing our spiritual and emotional health. When you hold on to a relationship, a dream, a plan that God has called you to let go, you'll only inhibit your life. Holding onto what you cannot have begins to harden your heart. You become angry and hopeless because something that you want so desperately is in your hands, yet you are still unable to attain because your hand is stuck in a jar. You begin to question God because you feel like you have a right (Is it not in your hand? Do you not have your fist wrapped tightly around it?). Soon spiritual and emotional growth stop; you're so focused on what's "rightfully" yours and you wait for God to fully give it to you, and when He doesn't, you assume that you're doing something wrong. Growth stops because you refuse to let it happen.
(Luke 9:23-25)
Keeping our fist in the jar also keeps us from meeting new people. Especially when we hold onto relationships. You can't shake someone's hand when yours is surrounded by glass. I know this from experience. You hold onto a relationship, you hope that God will heal it the easy way, that things will go "back to normal", so you don't let go. Meanwhile, all these amazing, new people are asking to shake your hand, but you won't get rid of that jar. Perhaps the only way things can go "back to normal" is to let the one you love and care about to move on.
(Matthew 16:24-27)
Finally, having that jar on our hand inhibits us from opening doors. We're so wrapped up in our predetermined plans that if God provides new opportunities we refuse to jump on them because we want what we almost have, but not quite. Perhaps God is asking that you to join a small group, join a ministry, enter leadership, take a risk. You have to let go of what you want in order to do His will.
(Proverbs 3:3-6)
Paul reminds us not to keep our fist in the jar.
Hebrews 3:12, 14-15 12 Be careful then, dear brothers and sisters. Make sure that your own hearts are not evil and unbelieving, turning you away from the living God. 14 For if we are faithful to the end, trusting God just as firmly as when we first believed, we will share in all that belongs to Christ. 15 Remember what it says: “Today when you hear his voice, don’t harden your hearts as Israel did when they rebelled.” (NLT)
Instead we are to surrender everything to Him.
Romans 12:1 1 And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. (NLT)
(If you want to read more on my thoughts about surrendering, check out this blog entry!)
And in the end, we all know that letting go of our fist full of candy is worth it. It obviously makes sense that if we just let go, we can get our hands out, feed ourselves, meet new people, and open new doors. And yet why are we still so stubborn to hold onto what's keeping us stuck? Perhaps we're afraid. Afraid that if we let go we'll lose it forever. And there's a good chance that's true. But is losing it not worth the gain we'll get from following God's perfect plan?
Yeah, maybe we won't get those Tootsie Rolls. But we will get what God has intended for us! Which is infinitely better. It's like comparing Tootsie Rolls to Apple Pie with Vanilla Ice Cream, which everyone knows there's nothing better than a hot slice of homemade apple pie with a scoop of cold vanilla ice cream!!!
Goodbye Tootsie Rolls. Hello Apple Pie Ala Mode!!!
1 Peter 1:6-7 6 So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while. 7 These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world. (NLT)
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Winter Returns. And So Does Apathy.
Hey all of my blog viewers. (Which probably means just Phil.) ;)
It's been a long time coming....over a month since my last blog. Life's been busy. And crazy. I'm taking 16 credits this quarter and plan to take 17 credits every quarter until graduation in June 2011. Which really isn't that far away. I'm playing Ultimate Frisbee, which is a blast! But after a tournament yesterday, my legs and joints are feeling it. Nothing like a hot bubble bath to melt away soreness!
I did get dreads during Christmas break! But alas, my Asian hair and inability to stay committed to the dreads is showing as they fall out of their knots. Dreads are very high maintenance the first couple months...and honestly, I'm just too lazy. So we'll see how much longer they'll last, I doubt not much more than a week. So be on the lookout for a brand new hair style!
Now on to what God has been doing. He continues to stretch me way beyond my bounds in this season of life. My walk has been struggling. Not struggling in the way that I'm losing faith, but struggling with apathy and contentment. And contentment in not a good way. Rather than seeking God and searching His heart, I find myself content with my mediocre season in my walk. I find myself feeling "fine" and not digging deeper. Content with merely arriving to service minutes before it starts and leaving seconds after it's over. Content in reading devos, scribbling down my "SOAP", and then moving on to homework. Content in singing Christian songs but not entering into a place of worship. Content with my feelings of loneliness and instead of searching out relationship, wallowing in my own aloneness.
I find myself in a place of contentment....that is not at all fulfilling or pleasing.
So what now? How do I pull myself out of a place apathy? How do I renew my waning passion?
Honestly, I'm not exactly sure. Some possible solutions include as such:
Fellowship: Western is an amazing school, unfortunately it has been difficult to find good fellowship, to establish solid relationships that challenge me in my faith. I need to search out a small group and seek friendships with those who can help establish me in my faith and push me to grow.
Scripture: Yes, I do my daily devos. But often I find myself reading the "bare necessities" and then moving on to my academic readings. Do I really dive into the Word? Not at all.
Prayer: I find this one to be the most important. In my devos, of course I do the "P" to my SOAP journaling but how many times do I really call out to my God? Pray about those I love? Pray for my school, my church, my friends and family? Prayer is more than just putting aside 5 minutes a day to go down your list, it's spending time in your relationship with God.
The past couple of months have been extremely difficult for me. While I find great excitement in living on my own, moving away from home, and being my own person (and trust me, I do!!), transition is difficult. As winter comes, so does the repeating pattern of mild depression. Or maybe not so mild. But as much as I struggle, I know God has me and will never forsake me.
I Thessalonians 5:16-18 Rejoice always. Pray without ceasing. In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
It's been a long time coming....over a month since my last blog. Life's been busy. And crazy. I'm taking 16 credits this quarter and plan to take 17 credits every quarter until graduation in June 2011. Which really isn't that far away. I'm playing Ultimate Frisbee, which is a blast! But after a tournament yesterday, my legs and joints are feeling it. Nothing like a hot bubble bath to melt away soreness!I did get dreads during Christmas break! But alas, my Asian hair and inability to stay committed to the dreads is showing as they fall out of their knots. Dreads are very high maintenance the first couple months...and honestly, I'm just too lazy. So we'll see how much longer they'll last, I doubt not much more than a week. So be on the lookout for a brand new hair style!
Now on to what God has been doing. He continues to stretch me way beyond my bounds in this season of life. My walk has been struggling. Not struggling in the way that I'm losing faith, but struggling with apathy and contentment. And contentment in not a good way. Rather than seeking God and searching His heart, I find myself content with my mediocre season in my walk. I find myself feeling "fine" and not digging deeper. Content with merely arriving to service minutes before it starts and leaving seconds after it's over. Content in reading devos, scribbling down my "SOAP", and then moving on to homework. Content in singing Christian songs but not entering into a place of worship. Content with my feelings of loneliness and instead of searching out relationship, wallowing in my own aloneness.
I find myself in a place of contentment....that is not at all fulfilling or pleasing.
So what now? How do I pull myself out of a place apathy? How do I renew my waning passion?
Honestly, I'm not exactly sure. Some possible solutions include as such:
Fellowship: Western is an amazing school, unfortunately it has been difficult to find good fellowship, to establish solid relationships that challenge me in my faith. I need to search out a small group and seek friendships with those who can help establish me in my faith and push me to grow.
Scripture: Yes, I do my daily devos. But often I find myself reading the "bare necessities" and then moving on to my academic readings. Do I really dive into the Word? Not at all.
Prayer: I find this one to be the most important. In my devos, of course I do the "P" to my SOAP journaling but how many times do I really call out to my God? Pray about those I love? Pray for my school, my church, my friends and family? Prayer is more than just putting aside 5 minutes a day to go down your list, it's spending time in your relationship with God.
The past couple of months have been extremely difficult for me. While I find great excitement in living on my own, moving away from home, and being my own person (and trust me, I do!!), transition is difficult. As winter comes, so does the repeating pattern of mild depression. Or maybe not so mild. But as much as I struggle, I know God has me and will never forsake me.
I Thessalonians 5:16-18 Rejoice always. Pray without ceasing. In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Alone? Or Lonliness?
I have recently been savoring a book given to me by one of my best friends Liz called The Lady, Her Lover, and Her Lord.
“Could it be possible that being alone does not have to mean that you are lonely?”
I’ve read this book before. I’ve read countless lines like this before. But in the season of life I am in now, the timing of this sentence could never have been more perfect. “Could it be possible that being alone does not have to mean that you are lonely?” I know it is not just possible, I know it can be true.
Everything about this next leg of this race is new for me. After 19 years, I no longer live with my family, no longer live in Oak Harbor, no longer have a solid church family right at my doorsteps, and I am no longer in an easy, comfortable place. And though I have felt a much deeper loneliness before, I still feel alone at times. Transition has been more of a challenge than I had anticipated. I am very blessed and I have family and friends who support me no matter what, but yet, sometimes I still feel isolated. Perhaps it is because I do not see them on a daily or even weekly basis. Regardless, I have been struggling with feeling alone. It is not the “I don’t have enough social time” or “I need to hang out” lonliness, but something deeper. I have been realizing that over the past year or so I had been fighting my “loneliness” with being social. I was spending as much time as I could with people so I wouldn’t feel lonesome. But that wasn’t it. It was not until I was forced into many quiet alone times (ironically) that I have discovered what the issue was. I was searching for community, friendship, relationship in people before I was searching for it in God. I took times of aloneness as a sort of solitary confinement; something that I could not enjoy. But now I realize that alone time is a time for growth. To be drawn closer to God.
Hosea 2:14 “But then I will win her back once again. I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her there,” (NLT)
Hosea 2:14 “Therefore, behold, I will allure her, Will bring her into the wilderness, And speak comfort to her.” (NKJV)
Jesus is leading me to the desert, to the wilderness. It is here that He will draw me in, comfort me, and push me beyond what I perceive is possible. I’m being lead to aloneness, and I’m excited.
I am alone frequently. But I am no longer lonely.
“Could it be possible that being alone does not have to mean that you are lonely?”
I’ve read this book before. I’ve read countless lines like this before. But in the season of life I am in now, the timing of this sentence could never have been more perfect. “Could it be possible that being alone does not have to mean that you are lonely?” I know it is not just possible, I know it can be true.
Everything about this next leg of this race is new for me. After 19 years, I no longer live with my family, no longer live in Oak Harbor, no longer have a solid church family right at my doorsteps, and I am no longer in an easy, comfortable place. And though I have felt a much deeper loneliness before, I still feel alone at times. Transition has been more of a challenge than I had anticipated. I am very blessed and I have family and friends who support me no matter what, but yet, sometimes I still feel isolated. Perhaps it is because I do not see them on a daily or even weekly basis. Regardless, I have been struggling with feeling alone. It is not the “I don’t have enough social time” or “I need to hang out” lonliness, but something deeper. I have been realizing that over the past year or so I had been fighting my “loneliness” with being social. I was spending as much time as I could with people so I wouldn’t feel lonesome. But that wasn’t it. It was not until I was forced into many quiet alone times (ironically) that I have discovered what the issue was. I was searching for community, friendship, relationship in people before I was searching for it in God. I took times of aloneness as a sort of solitary confinement; something that I could not enjoy. But now I realize that alone time is a time for growth. To be drawn closer to God.
Hosea 2:14 “But then I will win her back once again. I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her there,” (NLT)
Hosea 2:14 “Therefore, behold, I will allure her, Will bring her into the wilderness, And speak comfort to her.” (NKJV)
Jesus is leading me to the desert, to the wilderness. It is here that He will draw me in, comfort me, and push me beyond what I perceive is possible. I’m being lead to aloneness, and I’m excited.
I am alone frequently. But I am no longer lonely.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
"My love is over, it's underneath. It's inside, it's in between."
Have you ever questioned God, asked Him where He or His Love is? "Why did this have to happen?", "Why am I still hurting?", "Why am I suffering?", "Where are You when I need You most?".
I am most positive that at some point you have. I have. We all have. I doubt Him much more than I should. God's plan swings a certain way, it hurts, and I don't get it. Things happen that I don't want. Faith becomes a little bit harder; loving others becomes a battle. And yet through all my suffering and pain: through my confusion and uncertainty, I know God will remain faithful.
This morning's devos:
James 5:11 (NKJV)
Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord-that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful.
If you've heard the story of Job, you'll know that he was a Godly man. (Check out the book of Job!) In fact, he was such a follower of the Lord that the devil asks that he hurt Job to prove the only reason he was faithful was because of his wealth, family, and blessings. The devil takes away everything: his riches, his children, even his health. But in the end, God blesses him with twice as much as he had before (Job 42:10).
A lot of times we see this as God planning out pain for Job. That "God hurt Job because He knew Job would stay faithful.". But that wasn't God's plan at all!! "Indeed we count the blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord,"!!! The ending was God's plan to begin with. But God, in His infinite wisdom (which I do not understand at all. And it's a good thing I don't have to.) allowed pain to happen. BUT it wasn't His intended plan.
I have to remind myself that God does have an intended plan for me. And although He allows painful things to happen, He never planned for them. I will continue to trust my Jesus and know that His Love is here.
Check out this song by Tenth Avenue North! So good!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sw_8o85lFxA
Times by Tenth Avenue North (My favorite lyrics of the song below)
"Well, My love is over, it's underneath.
It's inside, it's in between.
These times you're healing, and when your heart breaks.
The times that you feel like you're falling from grace.
The times you're hurting. The times that you heal.
The times you go hungry, and are tempted to steal.
The times of confusion, in chaos and pain.
I'm there in your sorrow, under the weight of your shame.
I'm there through your heartache. I'm there in the storm.
My love I will keep you, by My pow'r alone.
I don't care where you fall, where you have been.
I'll never forsake you, My love never ends. It never ends."
I am most positive that at some point you have. I have. We all have. I doubt Him much more than I should. God's plan swings a certain way, it hurts, and I don't get it. Things happen that I don't want. Faith becomes a little bit harder; loving others becomes a battle. And yet through all my suffering and pain: through my confusion and uncertainty, I know God will remain faithful.
This morning's devos:
James 5:11 (NKJV)
Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord-that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful.
If you've heard the story of Job, you'll know that he was a Godly man. (Check out the book of Job!) In fact, he was such a follower of the Lord that the devil asks that he hurt Job to prove the only reason he was faithful was because of his wealth, family, and blessings. The devil takes away everything: his riches, his children, even his health. But in the end, God blesses him with twice as much as he had before (Job 42:10).
A lot of times we see this as God planning out pain for Job. That "God hurt Job because He knew Job would stay faithful.". But that wasn't God's plan at all!! "Indeed we count the blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord,"!!! The ending was God's plan to begin with. But God, in His infinite wisdom (which I do not understand at all. And it's a good thing I don't have to.) allowed pain to happen. BUT it wasn't His intended plan.
I have to remind myself that God does have an intended plan for me. And although He allows painful things to happen, He never planned for them. I will continue to trust my Jesus and know that His Love is here.
Check out this song by Tenth Avenue North! So good!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sw_8o85lFxA
Times by Tenth Avenue North (My favorite lyrics of the song below)
"Well, My love is over, it's underneath.
It's inside, it's in between.
These times you're healing, and when your heart breaks.
The times that you feel like you're falling from grace.
The times you're hurting. The times that you heal.
The times you go hungry, and are tempted to steal.
The times of confusion, in chaos and pain.
I'm there in your sorrow, under the weight of your shame.
I'm there through your heartache. I'm there in the storm.
My love I will keep you, by My pow'r alone.
I don't care where you fall, where you have been.
I'll never forsake you, My love never ends. It never ends."
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Procrastination at its Finest.
No, not really.
But school is boring. I find myself having to write a rhetorical reading analysis on two articles addressing the issues of packaging of food and what is has done to our society…and I don’t want to. Although I find the reading very interesting and the assignment relatively easy, I seem to have been stricken with a nasty disorder: laziness.
So here I am, sitting at my desk, in my nice folding chair, listening to my playlist (that includes Paramore, Emery, The Classic Crime, and others that make up the back bone of my music), and writing about basically nothing. At least it’s better than being on Facebook (which is going under “routine maintenance”) refreshing my home page over and over, waiting for a status to comment on. As I was sitting here, contemplating on what to write on, a thought came up on how God uses our failures and mistakes. How God chooses to redeem us! And not just once, after we’ve said the “Jesus, come into my heart” prayer, but on a daily basis. And He doesn’t just redeem our mistakes, but others as well. When people hurt and fail us. When they abandon us. When they break our confidence (intentional or not). Our Father redeems that too! Though He does not plan pain for us (Jeremiah 29:11-13), He will use everything for the good (Ephesians 1:11). He’s taken my insecurities, wounds, disappointments and used them to reach out to others. Because of the experiences I’ve had, I am more able to relate and empathize with others. In essence, He takes our piles of ashes and turns them into crowns.
He does this for His own Glory. That we, broken vessels, can be used for good. Even though we’re not perfect, cracked in fact, He’s given himself to us!
2 Corinthians 4:7-9 7 We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves. 8 We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. 9 We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed. NLT (emphasis added)
So in procrastinating my homework, I have stumbled upon a truth that comes up over and over in my life. And instead of indulging on these concepts by myself, I decided to share them with you.
Now….back to homework…
But school is boring. I find myself having to write a rhetorical reading analysis on two articles addressing the issues of packaging of food and what is has done to our society…and I don’t want to. Although I find the reading very interesting and the assignment relatively easy, I seem to have been stricken with a nasty disorder: laziness.
So here I am, sitting at my desk, in my nice folding chair, listening to my playlist (that includes Paramore, Emery, The Classic Crime, and others that make up the back bone of my music), and writing about basically nothing. At least it’s better than being on Facebook (which is going under “routine maintenance”) refreshing my home page over and over, waiting for a status to comment on. As I was sitting here, contemplating on what to write on, a thought came up on how God uses our failures and mistakes. How God chooses to redeem us! And not just once, after we’ve said the “Jesus, come into my heart” prayer, but on a daily basis. And He doesn’t just redeem our mistakes, but others as well. When people hurt and fail us. When they abandon us. When they break our confidence (intentional or not). Our Father redeems that too! Though He does not plan pain for us (Jeremiah 29:11-13), He will use everything for the good (Ephesians 1:11). He’s taken my insecurities, wounds, disappointments and used them to reach out to others. Because of the experiences I’ve had, I am more able to relate and empathize with others. In essence, He takes our piles of ashes and turns them into crowns.
He does this for His own Glory. That we, broken vessels, can be used for good. Even though we’re not perfect, cracked in fact, He’s given himself to us!
2 Corinthians 4:7-9 7 We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves. 8 We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. 9 We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed. NLT (emphasis added)
So in procrastinating my homework, I have stumbled upon a truth that comes up over and over in my life. And instead of indulging on these concepts by myself, I decided to share them with you.
Now….back to homework…
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