You Are Worth It

I have this long term, broken relationship with this thing called...
Low Self-Esteem.

This past week has been exceptionally difficult.  Believe or not, I really struggle with liking who I am. And specifically how I look.  You're probably thinking right now, "JESSICA!!! You're crazy!! What are you talking about?!? Shut up!!! You're beautiful inside and out!" All phrases I have heard many times before. And I know they're telling me the truth. Yet my heart still has a difficult time grasping the idea and struggles with agreeing that I'm perfectly fine with the body and looks I have now.  Maybe you understand what I mean, maybe you don't.

Before you judge me and how I struggle with seeing myself through God's, and even other people's eyes, understand that this has been a lifetime battle. Crazy, I know. I'm not going to go into my story as to why that is or how I've gotten out of it (if you want to hear it give me a ring/text/facebook/myspace/twitter (Haha, yay technology!) and we'll meet for coffee and I'll tell you my story in person) but hopefully this gives you a teeny tiny glimpse so you know this lack of self-worth isn't from nowhere. I just don't want to talk about it on the world wide web. Whoops.

So how do we overcome self-hate? How do I? Lord knows its been difficult. Hence I'm struggling with it yet again.  Learning to see myself through His eyes is one of the hardest things ever. But!! It's something that has completely transformed my life.  Yes, I'm struggling this week, but for the past year I've liked who I am and what I see in the mirror for the first time since I was very young!! It's amazing. :)

How have I even gotten this far? I discovered Grace!!!! God's sweet and abounding Grace! Grace for the mistakes I've made. Grace for the wrongs people have done to me. Grace for every ounce of sin that has polluted my body, my thoughts, and just me. The Lord doesn't care and He forgives and He sees you as done and done!!! 

Maybe you're thinking, "Jess, I know this stuff. I hear it at church all the time. What else can I do?". Pray, pray, PRAY! Every moment of every day that your mind is quiet, ask God to change your perspective. I promise it works! Every negative thought, capture it and cry out to the G-Man!  He will give you strength, especially in weakness (2 Cor. 12:9).  There is relief from these self-hate thoughts.

Don't give up.

This is going to have to be a 2-part blog!!! Woot!!...? There's so much more to say but I don't like reading long blogs...and I don't want to do that to you. Hopefully these words will get your mind turning, get your soul searching, and push you to get one-on-One with Jesus.  So be on the look out for mas!! In the meantime: here are some sweet verses to ponder.

Psalm 139: 14-15 ¹³ You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. ¹⁴ Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. (NLT) --check out the whole chapter!! Psalm 139

Genesis 1:27  ²⁷ So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. (NLT)

1 Peter 2:9 ⁹But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. (NIV)

Luke 12:6-7 ⁶ “What is the price of five sparrows—two copper coins? Yet God does not forget a single one of them. ⁷ And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows. (NLT)